This EPCOT Update Is Better Than 'The Bachelor'

Alright, time to go visit the rapscalions.

We’re heading to the village!

Those of you who’ve been here a while know exactly what that means — we’re heading to the Tiny Train Town! This small village in the Germany Pavilion at EPCOT is one of our favorite places around these parts. Why? Because the villagers are known for their shenanigans, tomfoolery, and occasionally, CRIME. Yup, there’s a lot of drama in that itty bitty city, and we like to stop by and watch it unfold.

Think of me as not only your Tiny Train Town Mayor, but your gossip columnist for the village. I keep you in the loop with all the happenings, and I know many of the villagers by name. For instance, Little Suzie likes to hang out on top of the town’s watchtower, and her adoptive father (who works for the police force) always has to go up there and find her before she meets her untimely demise. I keep filing safety reports to replace the handrail, but with so many projects ongoing in our town, it never seems to stay fixed.

Good grief Little Suzie

Last we checked in at the little red church, our jilted groom was starting a budding romance with a new woman! (Thank goodness — he’d been waiting outside that church for over a year after his bride left him at the altar.) Now, he has since PROPOSED and we’re getting ready for their fall wedding — how exciting!

What’s going on at the church?

Over at the train depot, our engineers are busy prepping for the summer travel season. It’s a great time for people to stop by and take a scenic ride through the village, so we’re seeing higher-than-usual traffic.

What’s up at the train depot?

But with the summer season, we often get a lot of rain, and that means our residents on the mountainside are in danger of mudslides! We’ve started to see some houses lose structural integrity, so there’s a small-scale evacuation going on right now. We’ll be sending some construction workers in the coming months to make sure these lovely people can return safely to their homes.

Oh no!

If you’ve been reading a lot of our updates, then you know that quite a few of our young people are in happy relationships now! This was thanks to a new dating initiative in town where the singles met up at the train stations to do speed dating. The gazebo has become a hot spot for date nights, and we’ve even seen a few proposals here as well! Seriously, you guys, the church is going to be BOOKED UP for weddings this fall.

The gazebo

So that’s a wrap on this week’s update! Love is in the air! Stay tuned to DFB for more news from the Tiny Train Town.

The anarchy within is mostly created by natural occurrences, like giant squirrels, wind, rain, and relatively godzilla-sized lizards who frequent the town, but we find it fun and entertaining to make up fictional stories about what COULD be happening. We are grateful to the folks who create and maintain this Tiny Train Town for Disney World, as it’s one of our favorite parts of EPCOT and always has been.

Stay tuned to DFB for more EPCOT news.

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